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Top 7 Reasons Why Chuck Norris Didn’t Invest in the Facebook IPO

By Oli Gardner on Might twenty fifth, 2012 in Funny

What Does Chuck Norris Suppose In regards to the Fb IPO?

Properly let’s discover out. And please be at liberty to tweet these alternative nuggets of knowledge… In any other case you’ll be in bother with Chuck #NotAGoodIdea

  1. Chuck doesn’t spend money on something besides roundhouse kick classes, which he teaches himself. » Tweet This «
  1. Chuck doesn’t “Like” something. Okay, a roundhouse kick to Zuckerbergs face can be considerably Likeable. » Tweet This «
  1. Shares in Chuck Norris are measured in badassery, not {dollars}. And he has muscular tissues in his toe nails which might be greater than your biceps. #TrueStory. » Tweet This «
  1. Should you recommend a share value to Chuck Norris, he’ll kick you within the face and inform the New York inventory alternate to purchase extra Chuck inventory and devalue Fb. » Tweet This «
  1. Should you unfriend Chuck Norris on Fb he’ll simply bitch slap you, take your cash and spend money on himself somewhat than Fb. » Tweet This «
  1. When Fb’s share value falls, Chuck may simply decide it up once more together with his superior fists. However why would he? » Tweet This «
  1. When Chuck was requested in regards to the Fb IPO, he stated “I Poked Oli” … he’s now in a coma. » Tweet This «

Should you preferred these ones, you may just like the 9 Reasons Chuck Norris Shouldn’t Work in Marketing too.

— Oli Gardner

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About Oli Gardner

Unbounce co-founder Oli Gardner has seen extra touchdown pages than anybody on the planet. He’s obsessive about figuring out and reversing dangerous advertising and marketing practices, and his disdain for entrepreneurs who ship marketing campaign visitors to their homepage is known, leading to touchdown web page rants that may peel paint off an unpainted wall. A prolific worldwide keynote speaker, Oli is on a mission to rid the world of selling mediocrity by utilizing data-informed copywriting, design, interplay, and psychology to create a extra pleasant expertise for entrepreneurs and clients alike. He was not too long ago named the “The 2018 Marketer to Watch,” within the beneath 46 class, by his mom.